Thursday, December 19, 2013

Partners in Ministry: The Joy of serving Jesus with your spouse.

"Marriage is fun."
"Marriage is crazy."
"Marriage is tough."
 Marriage is a process."
 "Marriage is what you make it."
"Marriage is great."
"Marriage is for old people."
"Marriage is a waste of time."
"Marriage is the greatest adventure on earth."
 
Above is a short list of things my wife Taylor and I heard before we got married. If you're married I'm sure you can remember everyone and their mama giving you their opinion/advice. Some good and helpful. Some encouraging and uplifting. Some not so encouraging and uplifting. People are fun!
 
My guess is that you don't need someone else's take on marriage, and especially when that someone has only been married for 8 or 9 months. So, I admittedly know nothing, but I was thinking on it today and wanted to share. 
 
The question crossed my mind: "When are Taylor and I the closest?"
 
I began to think about our lives together. We do almost everything together. We spend lots of time together and it probably seems odd to friends and family when they see one without the other. So out of all that time together, when are we closest?
 
Taylor and I are closest when both of us are close to Jesus, and both of us are closest to Jesus when we are serving Him. So, my conclusion is that our marriage is best and we are closest when we serve Jesus together. I feel closest to Taylor when we are partners in the Gospel ministry.
 
I don't think this is rare among Christian couples. And, I don't think that this should surprise us. I mean, why do most Christian couples go through pre-marital counseling with their pastor before tying the knot? Maybe because they have to before the pastor will marry them, but I think some do it with the intentions of making Jesus the foundation of their marriage from the start. So, why does it seem rare that we are distant from our spouse when one, or both, is distant from God?
 
“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and ignores it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”
Matt 7:24-27 (NLT)

Also, seeing Jesus work through Taylor makes me want Jesus to work through me. One of the greatest joys in my life is watching Taylor serve Jesus. Sometimes I like to take a step back and watch. I admire and long for Taylor most when she admires and longs for Jesus. I pray that I, as her husband, set a good example in this and that my relationship with Jesus would be one that makes her long for Jesus more as well.

"As iron sharpens iron,
so a friend sharpens a friend."
Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)
 
 
We also obviously think and act more biblically when we are closest to Jesus, therefore we treat each other with love and respect which can only work out well. We are closest when we are closest to being who God created us to be. I hold Taylor closest when she models the life of a biblical wife (which is usually :D), and she holds me closest when I model the life of a biblical husband. This is logical. It should not surprise us that faithfulness to God and obedience to His Word is a blessing to our marriages.
 
"For wives, this means submit your husbands..." Ephesians 5:22 (NLT)

"For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.."
Ephesians 5:25 (NLT)


 So, what's my take on marriage?
Serve Jesus together.


Here's a few things that Taylor and I try to do to keep our relationship with Jesus and each other fresh. We are not perfect and we are not the model. These are just a few things that have been recommended to us and have blessed our marriage thus far.

1. Pray together. Allow your marriage to be a triangle with Jesus at the top. Get on the same page with Jesus and your spouse.
2. Devotions Together. We both read the bible daily, but sometimes we study the word together. Make sure that you and your spouse have the same authoritative voice speaking into your lives.
3. Worship Jam Sessions Together. Sound cheesy? I love riding down the road with Taylor sitting in the middle seat of my pickup truck and us singing out to Jesus together. I'm sure others wouldn't enjoy it, but I think Jesus does.
4. Serving Jesus together in the Church and in the Community.
I don't even know what the ministries I'm involved with would look like without Taylor. Seeing her serve unselfishly pulls me closer to her and to Jesus. Sit down with your spouse and pray about where Jesus wants to use you and jump in.

I think most of this is basic, but so easy to miss. Don't miss out on God working in you're marriage. Serve Jesus together. 

2 comments:

  1. Are u sure you're not older? Very wise observations. lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. One tricky party, which many a pastor unfortunately has gotten wrong, is confusing the priority of God with the priority of the ministry. Or put another way, I have seen too many pastors confuse what God was asking them to do with what their parishioners were asking them to do.

    Anything God asks you to do is always first place. But it can be easy to forget that ministry plans and things your parishioners ask you to do are not always directives from God, and those that are not directives from God need to take second place to responsibility towards your own family. Jesus first, spouse second, children third, then the rest of the church and non-church opportunities after that.

    I'm not saying any of this to say that you don't know this, of course. I hope it doesn't come across as that. It's just a good thing to remember, because there will always be times that people in the church expect you to drop things that your family needs from you in order to do this or that "holy" activity that God hasn't actually directed you to do. Even seemingly good activities can be distractions from where Jesus wants us to go if we don't keep seeking His direction for our life in each decision.

    ReplyDelete